Sick Economy Humor

Today's Top Tips

Dozens of tips for the price of one click
This one link from LifeHack.org yields dozens of money saving tips. You also get a pep talk, putting our current economic crisis in context, in terms of the rest of the world’s woeful plight. 8 Simple Ways to Save Money & Help Stop Poverty gives you ideas for what to do with all the money you save via their tips (hint: donate). The tips range from the easily said and done like make your own coffee and bring your own lunch to work to more industrious tips such as insulating your crawl space and getting a lot more organized in tracking your expenses. Worth taking some notes.

Don’t wait. Do these things now
This “Four Tips: Smart Money Moves for a Down Economy” article from the Wall Street Journal is pretty basic but it doesn’t hurt to hear again how to create a budget and eliminate debt.

Stay away from free lunches, and other free advice
In these tough times, apparently some are getting taken advantage of by people that are supposed to be helping. Another cautionary short article from the Wall Street Journal, this one on retirement planning scams. Read it and grind your teeth.

Laughing’s better than crying

"I'll give you an idea how bad the economy is: you know the giant national debt clock in Times Square that keeps track of the national debt? It's now run out of digits. This is true. It only goes up to a trillion, and we passed that. We're now going to add two more digits so it can go up to a quadrillion dollars. Are these even real numbers anymore? Don't they sound like the kinds of numbers you'd use when you argue with your friends?" --Jay Leno

Sick Economy Humor

Today's Top Tips

Not a good time to move?
Money magazine’s November '08 issue is, not surprisingly, full of money tips. One advice-packed article is “23 Money Skills for a Richer Life.” The section promises and delivers “crucial money-related know-how that’ll keep paying off long after the crisis has passed.” Hmmm, I wish they’d give a date on when this crisis will pass.

Among the tips were these two house-related articles: “How to Get More Space Without Moving” (sorry, no links yet; see page 124 of the hard-copy mag) full of décor tips, and “How to Figure Out If a Home Renovation Will Pay” (page 131). If you want to recoup at least 75% of your renovation costs when you sell (three years from now they caution), first take the following quiz: “Do buyers really want what you’re planning?”; “Is your upgrade in line with comparable houses in the area?”; “Which way is the neighborhood trending?”; “How much do you plan to spend?” and “How is your ‘hood weathering the downturn?” The experts’ dissection of the answers help point Survivors in the right direction.

Do you really need a house?
There are so many ways that question could be answered, but if you answered it in the most direct way: “Yes, I really need a house” check out this item on a free house. All you need is a way to transport a mighty brick house, all by yourself. Good luck.

When is half a house better than none?
Probably never (see photo above), but if you ever wondered how you could afford a place to live after a costly divorce, read about this Cambodian couple’s solution.

Laughing's better than crying

"They found that Americans actually eat more during bad economic times, that people become fatter during bad financial periods. Isn't that amazing? This is the only country in the world, when the economy goes south, not only don't you lose your a**, it gets bigger." --Jay Leno

Sick Economy Humor

Today's Top Tips

Even though extreme times call for extreme measures, I’m like many other Survivors: time-stressed and a bit lazy. So I’m always looking for ways to save money that don’t take a lot of time or effort. See below.


Saving money on dry cleaning
This item ran in the New York Times’ Advertising column, so isn’t exactly rife with tips, but does talk up two interesting new products from Procter & Gamble: Tide Total Care and Downy Total Care. Both products help you cut down drastically on your dry cleaning bills by helping clothes look new and keep their shape for a longer time (up to 30 washes). Quote from P&G: “Women spend $1,500 a year on dry cleaning, and 65 percent of those clothes are actually machine washable.” Don’t ask me exactly how this “fabric care product" works, but I’m going to try it. My dry cleaned clothes often look crisp but aren't really fresh and odor free, so maybe this new way of cleaning will be a double win.

So once you’ve stopped dry cleaning clothes…
… you need to find ways to save money—and energy—while washing your clothes. This blog posting from the NY Times’ Green Inc. blog details some basic ways to conserve while doing your laundry. It’s the typical list of “duh, why didn’t I think of that” tips that actually can’t be read enough times--maybe eventually it'll sink in. Want to save energy/money while using your dryer? Dry multiple loads in succession (piggybacking on the heat you’ve built up). And the lengthy list of comments to the posting offer a bounty of easy tips such as clean your lint trap with a little dish soap and water to really increase your dryer’s efficiency. The blog readers also share tips for the best drying rack--the ultimate energy saver.

Still not cutting coupons?
Coupon-cutting is becoming cool again (wait—was it ever cool?). This article from cnn.com details the growing trend of using coupons in the U.S., after 15 years of decline in their use. The head of the coupon council issues this hopeful statement: "I think that what we're seeing is a behavioral change in the consumer that could have lasting effects. If you shift buying patterns and enjoy benefits of doing that, you will likely continue in that pattern. For the marketer, it's an opportunity to bring in more customers and get them to try new things." Sure, we’ll try new things, but all we really want to do is save money, so make those coupons worthwhile, marketers.

Coupons are rife on the internet--no cutting required, you just need to plug in a number. I’ll post some on the Digest when I find them. In the meantime, don’t forget to check out Entertainment.com for their $30 book of casual dining coupons—if you have a family and still want to go out occasionally, the discount book purports to save you close to $1,500/year on dining, travel, and shopping. With that savings, and the savings on dry cleaning (above) you’re already $3,000 ahead in your yearly expenses. (Well, if you can believe these numbers from marketers…)

Laughing's better than crying

"I don't know, should we talk about the stock market? Oh my gosh, today, talk about your roller coaster, dropped 800 points. Whoa, so thank you, bailout rescue plan. Thank you very much." --David Letterman

Sick Economy Humor

Today's Top Tips

When you just have to fly
No one likes air travel these days, but sometimes it's unavoidable. Airline expert Rick Seaney has created a state-of-the-art booking site called Farecompare.com that closely tracks airfares, and allows you to do the same. Also, to become a truly informed consumer, you can sign up for Farecompare's e-newsletter. Or if you love blogs, check out Rick Seaney's blog where you'll be a more savvy air traveler after one quick perusal.

Avoid lines at all costs
A related flying article in National Geographic's Traveler magazine gives great tips on how to avoid those nasty airline lines. It's not really money saving so much as time saving, but whatever saves our sanity during these trying times is fodder for the Survivors Digest.

What spending no money for a month is like
An October Reader's Digest article details a yuppie family's commitment to no discretionary spending for a month. It’s funny (and inspiring) to read how it worked out. "Cranky" is a word used in the article.

Laughing's better than crying

"There was a sign at the station near by my house that said, 'We take Visa, Mastercard, Discover Card, and American Express.' After I filled up they took my Visa, Master Card, my Discover Card, and my American Express." --Jay Leno

Sick Economy Humor

Today's Top Tips

First, remove the temptation
Sure, you can cut down on trips to the mall as a nice passive way to curb spending, but too often the stores come to us in the form of glossy catalogs. For every 10 catalogs I throw away, there's one that catches my eye with something I don't really need. Now you can simply delete the temptation by going to Catalog Choice. There, once you register, you simply click on the catalog you want to delete (they're listed alphabetically), plug in your customer number, and hit delete. I went through a pile of 10 glossies yesterday in 15 minutes and then stuck them in the circular file. Very satisfying.

Easy online tracking of your spending
Here's some info on taking the first steps towards getting a grip on current spending. This 10/3 NY Times "Your Money" column gives quick nods to Quicken and Wesabe's online financial tracking systems before focusing on Mint.com's easy-to-use pie charts. Writer Ron Lieber quickly figured out he was spending too much on dining out compared to eating in (and compared to other people like him). By tweaking some Mint numbers Ron was able to figure out a more livable ratio. Earlier this year I got distracted from filling out the lengthy Quicken info forms, but this has fired me up to go back at it.

8 ways to cut your grocery bill
Sample tip from SmartMoney.com's smart list of 8+ tips:

“Shop on Sundays. It's the best day to buy groceries. Armed with the fresh batch of coupons from your Sunday newspaper and the weekly sales circular, you can maximize your savings. Consumers who combined the two reported saving an average $678 annually, according to a recent Consumer Reports survey.”

Up ’til now, I’ve stayed away from the grocery store on Sundays (clueless dads and their kids take over the place) but maybe this makes venturing into the maw more worthwhile.

Laughing's better than crying

"As you know, the government takes 40 percent of what you make. The other 60 percent, of course, is taken by the gas stations." --Jay Leno